ALREADY ONE YEAR

photo : Taken by André / Baskatong 2010
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MY MOM FRANÇOISE
It hasn't been a year in wilderness and solitude like my instructor Bob Kull's experience, thesis and novel's title say, but today marks -my year in solitude- from my Mom's presence and great love. One year she breathe, embraced life, for her last time. We shared about that in our forums a little. I don't mean to be nostalgic, or to cry on myself, I just need to spend time with people I love. Even if it can only be in thoughts. I am always happy to feel alive.

A souvenir from our last vacation together, in Baskatong Qc, the summer before. Her Alzheimer was already pretty heavy for her to deal with. She was convinced she -knew- she had been there, in that little cottage 6 hours away from home in the deep beautiful wooden and area, when she was young. The plates were the same as in her childhood. Emerging souvenirs were her reality. And we would often laugh together about how that was. In her own lucid words, when the name Lyne, or my daughter refused to emerge, she would manage to say -you are someone I know I love and who loves me back-. It was her reality. And I could only see things her way. The first time your mom forgets your name is seen as a hard experience for most people, selfishly, or legitimately I guess. I was just hoping she would stick around long enough for me to tell her how much I loved her, over and over and my name didn't matter. We could say it as much as we felt, she would always be as happy as if of course, she had never heard it before.

December 18. (Today is also due date for a paper on objective reality.)
If it wasn't for respecting the readings we had to do and the fact they were fascinating, (and well, I figured I have a course assignment to try and understand), I guess my paper would be pretty subjective and nonphysical reality would cross my mind. Today as a -reality-, I wish I could just look into my feelings, dedicate my day to her, lye down in the sand, feel the wind, the sea and not move. But today, tomorrow, whatever, she won't tell the difference anyhow. She believed in interconnection of all things when I think back, in belonging to something greater. What I can think of this minute, is although I was supposed to be one all my life, an orphan, I now know I have experienced it with some «realness» for a year now.

I wrote that last semester in a forum on another subject, but I will always remember the day my mom (and her Alzheimer) said, with doubt or fear in her inquiring eyes while we were discussing of Darwin : But are we sure the earth is round?

TRAGEDY OF THE COMMONS

Under the arrow is our home. The former hotel is next door right hand neighbor.


Used to be luxury 70's hotel, where famous people liked to come, our home owner told us. I think Le Corbusier would like this one. It reminds me of the Montreal Silos in worst shape.

Jo's home that we rent until January, is for sale


Our first left hand neighbor's destroyed home. For sale as well.

Second left hand vestige of unknown neighbor' former home. ______________________________________________
And..Hard or Soft Systems.
Week 3 and 4 subjects can seem abstract, but are actually often tangible. Were we to try and determine whether a hurricane's probabilities would be best determined by Hard System's or Soft Systems scenario, I would guess a Hard one (and hard on the people). A Hard systems' approach could evaluate the hurricane's path would eventually hit San Blas, Nayarit, that day in 2002. The intensity, speed and strength of its winds would also figure among the predictions.

Were we to determine what possible outcomes this people's lives after Kenna, then, a Soft System could be put in place to try and find solutions, in regards with peoples stress, family re-localization, opportunities, insurances, governmental help, age, home damage etc...

As for the Tragedy of the Commons, behind the natural but destructive Hurricane, we know we are allowed to wonder whether it was only such a natural path of the elements or if they werein the course of some more obscure combination of human's action over the commons, leading to atmosphere disturbance, leading to Global warming, leading to undertow movements, leading to the biggest challenge of -our-their? times...Climate change and Kenna, hand in hand.

I will post the subject respective readings that Bob Kull suggested us, here soon.

SURF OR BIKE RIDE ?

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It looks like easy going farniente, but we work more then we play. Too bad for us.

POBRE ALACRANE

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It was late, I was dead, well alive dead, and lying down on the floor with my dog Zero. I see this 4-5 inches being ...pass right in my eyes angle. A SCORPION. Panic! of course. Except, I don't kill beings. But this one could kill me. Someone was going to die right there, and I didn't feel ready. I didn't even have time to wonder if the town's little hospital would be able to save me.

Only a guy could do that I thought. Grab a broom, hit it, and think its dead. I asked -him- to kill it -again-, to make sure. Shoe. Shovel. Better twice. That is when you see what humans are capable of.
Of course, internet comforted me that it was him or me. Or my dog. I read:
Deadly 10 to 20 minutes, among the worst killers, Mexican ones.
Those were not Academic sources, just the kind of source my conscience needed.
That was day 3. Now, a month later, with my friend bullying me for being voluntarily responsible for an insect's death, I wonder. Couldn't I have stayed clam and find a fair issue for him, had I known then, that he wouldn't kill me for sure. That's what some people say from burglars isn't it?

After still worrying about seeing his whole family crawl up my bed for revenge, I have asked for the scorpion's forgiveness tons of times since. Now looking back, I now he was just walking away after all. I have tried recovering from my guilt through drowning dragonflies savings and wings repair. It seems it wasn't deadly after all and people here say they haven't seen any in 20 years. The poor guy was just not lucky...

In a world where we are all interconnected, I figured a little bit of my sorrow accompanied the little creature. I owed it to him.
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CULTURE AS AN EDUCATIONAL SYSTEM

Our first cultural event, last Wednesday, nov 16th 2011.

As Andre was pointing it out, our firend Luc Baranger, seemed he was here as well, asking himself if his last book would be in the new library, translated and in multiple copies.

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BIG EVENT AND JAMAICA JUICE FOR CULTURE
Inauguration of a cultural center in Aticama, neighbor pueblo to San Blas’s, is not taken lightly. Library, computer center (3 computers) and intergenerational place at the same time, brought together officials from neighboring towns, farmers, academics, a few gringos from the area, donors, and entire families. School children were authorized a leave to attend and assess the importance of access to culture was occurring here. Modest means, but the colorful festivities honor a most respected fiesta. Drums and horns, flag, national anthem, red ribbon, local singer, poet, no one, nothing was forgotten

A native peasant with his cowboy hat, silvered tooth and eloquent words, gave a living, moving and proud speech. He compared the cultura he had witnessed form the wisdom of his 70 years, a culture marked with pesticidos to this culture type that, through the center, his grandchildren would have access to. I wiped away a tear. Our brand new amigos, Anne and Gilles, who had invited us, were responsible for the visual appearance of various elements of the place. ____________________________________________________



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ABCD
Illustrated a la mano, by Gilles. Anne was in charge of the visual identity. (missing picture.)
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Single shelf for filosofia and psicologia.
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A full shelf for literature and rhetoric. The covers seem to plunge us into the past, but are actually quite recent and very pretty. The paper almost felt 100% recycled and the feel recalled Quebec’s Pascal publishing house, 1945. I thought of my friend Patrice and his biliothéca which, to himself, would have filled that modest but inspiring place.

Our wealthy system felt as though even culturally, we had everything to be over satiated . Some people here where trying to make a reinforcing loop towards more equity, but
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SYSTEMS THINKING
Chosen in regards and respect with my actual course and interests, Charles Darwin becomes Carlos Darwin. Is it to say origins are not immutable. I would think that Fritjof Capra must have read that book himself.
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CARAMBA
The classifying system may seem archaic, but reminded me my youthful joy finding the coveted book in these magic of these little boxes. The entire library could fit in 6 small drawers, but some scanning would not be long before it happened was I told. And here I am, lucky enough to study at a distance without many worries except scorpions, moskitos, mange...
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LEAVING THE -CULTURAL- INAUGURATION
Rather modest little house but satellite dish imposes itslef. As elsewhere, TV is watched in the Aticama's homes. Will the Center manage to attract young people within its walls?
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ECONOMICAL SYSTEM

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CUANTO CUESTO POR FAVOR ?
The best SanBlas platano bread it seems.
It's price, as often for the rest, varies whether (but who could blame them):
1. Your Gringo features show or not (hard to hide)?
2. The quality of your Spanish accent?
3. Your gender (M/F)?
Him: 60 pesos
Myself: 45 pesos

For bottled water in big container -refill-, who would think we would but, no choice here, no one drinks tap water. Agua purificada.
Him: 25 pesos
Myself: 15 pesos

I believe it's the accent :-)
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In an economical system where you can hardly feed all your kids with your fishing, what kind of feedback loop could we put in place to avoid feeling like western ricos when trying to participate in local economy (or should we, to start with, react, wobble, feedback loop I mean, I am not questioning participation.). Communication feels like the best asset. I am not the type to negotiate under -wealth- perceptions. Paying 20 pesos instead of 15 because I am considered more financially at ease seems fair enough. I am here, therefore I am. I defend and encourage fair trade of course. Was gender the issue, I would -fight-, under recognition of my strong desire to adapt myself and share a culture, I would manifest myself. Otherwise, I just wish to slowly build some trustful relationships. As Kauffman would perhaps say, it is a complex system where energy is spent to maintain itself and the need to be pro-active in order to initiate changes in its environment is needed and very precarious.

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SOBRE LA PLAZA
Beautiful San Blas bells, feels like being in a Pagnol novel or film. Will add bottom of the church later, otherwise it would be indecent.
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SOCIAL OR MECHANICAL SYSTEMS

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LIVING OUTSIDE
Hydro or Internet, can seem like same complicated task in San Blas. We can wonder what would happen if we turned off the switch. Probably not much ...less.
As Kauffman (1) puts it, «mechanical systems (car, furnace, or this here ) can be switched completely off for a while and then turned back on again. The same is true of some very simple living things. Plant seeds that can wait for decades for the right conditions to start growing and some microscopic animals can be frozen solid and then be brought back to life.» Certain frogs, per example, put themselves on -low heart beat- for as much as 7 years in the ice before coming back to life. Life is such an amazing system.

(1) Draper L. Kauffman, Jr.
Systems One: An Introduction to Systems Thinking (1980)
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BOUNDED REALITY
Bounded reality is one of Meadow's concepts explained in —Thinking in Systems. A primer.— It has to do with being informed and therefore, being able to take informed decisions as well. She has a great story in that sense of an Amsterdam neighborhood of similar housing and families. «Some houses were built with the electric meter down in the basement. In other homes, the electric meter was installed in the front hall. It was discovered that some of the houses in this subdivision used one-third less electricity.» Being able to witness or be aware of their energy use brought front hall families to change their behavior.

I suspect not many really spend much lighting energy here anyhow. Lights are warm and out all day and night. Awareness finds all sorts of different ways. But bounded realities or being informed, doesn't necessarily lead to decisions that will benefit -the whole- as Meadow's shares, and as we will see later. I will talk about other environmental issues later...

Meadows gets into a lot of financial details to explain Systems in the early chapters. In is not my favorite part, although I'm doing my best to understand it all, I feel I don't always get it, too many stocks and flow charts for someone who usually likes diagrams they give me the turnover... I felt much more at ease reading Capra. I also really appreciated Kauffman simplicity in vulgarizing basically the same ideas in a much friendlier way, to me that was. Still, I am really enjoying this class.